As a fan of all sports and things Minnesota, I naturally despise all that is Wisconsin. I have had plenty of experiences that support these feelings, but last weekend, I had a very SLIGHT change of heart and have a better understanding of this relationship.

I traveled to Black River Falls two weekends ago with some good friends for some fun cabin time, birthday celebration, and small town bar hopping. We would all agree that the weekend was an ABSOLUTE blast and I completely forgot we were in Wisconsin until we happened upon a bar where the Packers/Falcons playoff game was on. If you remove this 2 hour experience (we did NOT stay for the whole game), I LOVE the fact that only in Wisconsin, can you find the following in one bar in a single evening: beer ONLY served from cans, the regular Saturday night potluck set up, the resident dog, a stray cat, $2.50 microwave cheeseburgers, $1 previously viewed VHS tapes, maple syrup for sale by the quart, and a man in full camo double fisting the microphones on karaoke night. My revelation…I love drinking in Wisconsin when you remove their obnoxious sports fans. Let me repeat that…a Minnesotan talking about LOVING Wisconsin…when you remove 80% of the people from their state.


So, I now clearly understand that my hatred for Wisconsin stems from the behavior of their obnoxious sports fans. I get it-you love your sports teams, but so do we. Our feelings for your state are NOT that of deep jealously of your sports teams either (I have heard that just a few TOO many times from Wisconsin fans). Do I wish that our Gopher football team did not have the longest Rose Bowl drought in the Big Ten? Of course. Do I wish the Bears would have beat you weeks ago when they had the chance so I didn’t have to watch Aaron Rodgers being a punk flashing his imaginary championship belt? Duh. Does that mean I am jealous of your state’s sports teams? No. Both my 14 year history as a MN sports fan and our state’s complete sports history actually prove that we don’t have that much to be jealous of. Recently, the power has shifted a bit in your favor, but I have confidence that power will shift back in the near future. Keep in mind, this is only regarding sports I (or our state) actually care about, so the NBA has been excluded.

Hockey: In my MN sports fan history, Minnesota has won 2 National titles and 3 WCHA titles compared to Wisconsin’s 1 National title and 1 WCHA title. Overall, Minnesota has 5 National titles and has won the MacNaughton Cup 11 times compared to Wisconsin’s 6 National titles and 3 MacNaughton Cups. But, we are the state of hockey and have a NHL team, so we win. This is my blog and my math-I really don’t care if you disagree.

Baseball: The MN Twins have won 2 World Series titles compared to the Brewers ZERO World Series titles. The MN Twins have made 5 appearances in the ALCS (since 1969) compared to the Brewers being the ONLY National League team to NOT have made an appearance in the modern day NLCS. In my MN sports fan history, the Twins have made 6 postseason appearances to the Brewers 1. No fuzzy math here-Minnesota wins and we now know how baseball is meant to be played; outdoors. No retractable roof for the weary here.

College Basketball: In my Gopher Basketball scandal filled MN sports fan history, we have claimed only 1 Big Ten title and 1 Final Four appearance (technically, not in the books, but I have the ticket to prove it happened). This hardly compares to Wisconsin Basketball’s 3 Big Ten titles, 1 Final Four appearance, 2 Elite Eight appearances, and 4 Sweet Sixteen appearances over that same course of time. I would argue that had we never had Russ Archambault on our team, we would have similar performance over the last 14 years. Because of this, I only give Wisconsin a slight edge here.

College Football: No stats are needed from the past 14 years to prove that you have the edge over MN the last 1.4 decades. BUT, over the history of MN sports, the Gophers have 6 National Titles and 18 Big Ten Championships compared to the Badgers ZERO National Titles and 12 Big Ten Championships. Clearly, we win. I will give Camp Randall and State Street a WIN here in terms of game day atmosphere-there is no MN sports fan that can argue that fact.

NFL Football: Alright, we know the Packers have 12 league championships, 8 conference championships, and 13 division championships. The Vikings have ZERO championships, 4 conference championships, and 18 division championships. We have suffered some gut wrenching losses and currently have a broken, crappy football home. You clearly win this one along with winning the award for being some of the most obnoxious fans in the NFL.

To summarize, us Minnesota fans are NOT jealous of Wisconsin sports. I have found that I actually like your state and can relate to your love of beer and cheese. BUT, no amount of cheap beer and good cheese will change the fact that I loathe your sports fans. Will we continue to travel to Wisconsin to watch our favorite MN sports teams play despite the fact that you give us the worst seats ever in the stadium (yes-this picture is in the far, upper corner of Camp Randall against a concrete wall)? Of course.